I usually don't participate in "nurse-ins," but I couldn't resist this one.

When my lactation page was brand spankin' new, I posted this:

"NURSING IN PUBLIC?
I do not condone nurse-ins, flashing your breasts openly to prove a point or shaming women that just can't do it... but here are some tips for feeding your baby in public:"

blah blah....you get the idea. Time to eat it, because I went to a nurse-in today. And friends, here's why:

Dear Hobby Lobby,

I absolutely adore your place of business! Walking into your store seems to cause my heart, my mind and my wallet to burst open in acceptance and enjoyment. I come there A LOT, and typically with all six of my children (though it started with 4 when I found the crafter within just dying to put hot glue or a needle to everything.) I was sad and confused when I heard the location I most often frequent had been unwelcoming to nursing mothers. At least two have communicated their stories in the last few days and I couldn't stay silent and here's why.

A) I agree there are three sides to every story. Mine, yours and the truth. Regardless of how accurate the stories I've heard are, there has yet to be a public response, even a simple one on your facebook page. If there's no problem, why not say so? Companies typically speak out that an individual employee did not act in accordance with the company policy and they will be trained better... something to that effect. But silence is bothersome. This nurse-in was to get you to say something to the public. While it involved only individuals in the past, it now involves crafty nursing mama bears everywhere. I will not shop where I don't believe I could nurse my baby if she needed to be.

B) You know there isn't any private space in your store at all, right? The one bathroom you have in the back corner doesn't even have a chair to seat a mom that may be willing to sit in there (I'm not and I'm sad for any woman that feels she should.). You cram beautiful trinkets, supplies and decor in every stinking corner of your store. Where could a mom nurse in your store that's considered appropriate in your eyes? Another reason why I attended this nurse-in, to reveal our predicament. This leads me to the next point.

C) You should WANT to make Hobby Lobby a comfortable place for moms. Imagine one like me, I have counted it up and I have purchased over 500 yards of fabric from your store in the last three years. You have a fabric I simply adore and need oodles of on a regular basis to spread the fabulosity to my friends and their friends' friends. That's just fabric, I've bought tons of other amazing crap there too. When I'm shopping with my gaggle and baby is hungry, but I have yet to complete my shopping, I have three options: let baby cry, leave or nurse baby. I'm discreet and my babies don't take long to eat. I could be showing maybe 1-3 inches  of skin around baby's mouth if she's wiggly for about 10-15 minutes then move on with my shopping, or I could leave - stressed and frustrated to not accomplish my mission. "The longer I'm in your store, the more money I spend," - said almost every crafter, ever.

D)...hmm... where did I see Hobby Lobby in the news lately? Oh yeah, They're a Christian, family-owned company that rightfully refuses the right to pay for birth control designed to abort fertilized eggs. You were loud and proud when you defended unborn babies... why so quiet when it comes to defending the life-sustaining nourishment to those babies outside the womb? The hypocrisy gives me a headache. Let us feed these precious babes and buy our crafts. That's all we want. 

This nurse-in was peaceful and intended to draw attention for Hobby Lobby to support women that now feel unwelcome in your store. I was late, so I only got to meet a couple of the wonderful women there. I went to do a little shopping, planning to nurse my sweetheart if she was hungry. Guess what? She wasn't hungry, so I didn't nurse her. I'm still puzzled some people don't get that, the nursing is about the baby. Please let us know if you do or do not support moms feeding their babies in your store. It will make a difference. I won't shop there anymore until you do, and I'm not the only one.

Sincerely,

A mom just trying to do best for her babies.

Love Wins!

Awww, isn't that sweet? Love won today.

The ruling wasn't a surprise to me at all... but what I am surprised about is how little I'm reading the word "gay," and how much I'm reading the word "love" as people post about this news. I started asking myself what the opposite of that would be... "hate wins?"

A decade ago, I started thinking about how I was discovering over time after being married that the word love as an emotion means absolutely crap to me. Somebody could abuse someone and still say they loved them... say wha? This is when I dove into what love meant to me, including thoughts stemming from my religious studies. In church, I'm taught charity isn't just donating, it's the pure love of Christ. Loving someone means you'll support them, you'll take care of them, care about them and really put their needs above yours. Loving someone, is having a charitable spirit towards them - always.

Okay, so I was not in favor of the ruling that same-sex couples should be allowed to marry. Marriage is a box definition from the beginning: one man and one woman. So, thinking outside the box, do I have a problem with same-sex couples having the rights I do? No, I don't mind at all. To me, this is about the definition of marriage and what that means... so back to "love wins."

If I'm opposed to the ruling, I must be in the hate category. Wanna know what's weird though? I don't hate gay or lesbian people. I can love them as easily as my heterosexual friends. shocker.
Something that was expressed with this campaign is "these people can finally express their love now!" Like Michelle, the first lady, who waited until an African-American man was President to finally be able to say she's proud to be an American. Sorry folks, I didn't know my desire to keep the institution of marriage pure and unchanged was preventing you from loving each other. My bad.

Congrats on the publicity, folks... the campaign, "love wins," has again made everyone that's not in favor, a "hater." Even though it's false. Just think about it.

10 reasons why you should not mow the lawn barefoot.

 Here's all 10.

Why did you click the link? Don't you know better by now? 
The titles never lead you to what you're expecting and you're bombarded with ads. 

It's never what you expect... were you expecting severed toes? Blood?

K, here you go... psycho....

Have a nice day!

My friend spiritually saved my life.

I have a dear friend getting married today (probably married by now! gah) So I've been reflecting on her impact in my life and I could definitely state she had a very positive one, perhaps the greatest in my youth - but we'll never know....

I'll start off by saying, if you aren't an individual of great faith, this story may not mean much to you now, but maybe some day. 

Between 14-15 yrs old

I had a "rebel phase" where I turned against my beliefs, in secret from my parents... I did many things that were not in accordance with the gospel. That's not the point, so fast- forward... I was without any really close friends for several months because of this change in my standards... my "same-standard" friends did welcome me back for lunch time in high school and such, but things just weren't the same. It was hard to connect with them after what I had done.

It was my 16th birthday... but I didn't have anything planned. No party, not even with family. It was very depressing. I just thought, 'screw it, I'm going clubbing... being good isn't worth it.' I put on my makeup with every intention of drinking and getting down with some dude at a club. There was a guy on the bus that mentioned going to a certain club and condescendingly said, "it's not your kind of place, you wouldn't like it." He didn't know the life I had recently left behind and I knew exactly what to expect. My mom thought I was just going to go drive somewhere, maybe get a bite to eat.

With a heavy, bitter heart, I had my purse and threw the front door open... only to see my friend Pamela standing there, along with some other friends she dragged along - all to surprise me on my birthday. I'm in tears right now... that night would have significantly changed the path I was on, for how long - I don't know. Whether you're Mormon or not, a teen girl going to a club alone looking for trouble is pretty dangerous. 

Amy and Pam at 2002 Winter Olympics

Ever since then... I've tried to make my life worth it, I've never faltered on those "big" commandments connected with morality and the word of wisdom doctrine. Ever since then, I've tried to help others - whether they asked for it or not - maintain their standards. To help them feel loved and cared about.

If you ever see a friend out to hurt themselves, intentionally or not... pray you'll know what to say when it comes, and please say something. Eh, you might regret what you say if it's not received well, but you would definitely regret saying nothing.

Parents are teaching kids to say Yes

"Hey everyone, let's play a game!" I've seen this only about 10 times in my newsfeed, it's time to speak up!

Why the dollar value? Why the heck is a felony or egging grouped with traveling? Ever care to wonder before you participate?

How would you feel about getting your house egged? Someone did it to our car, and guess what, it's freaking hard to clean up...and the whole time, you're asking yourself, "who would do this to us?"

These are mostly adult women commenting...

Doorbell ditching can be harmless... should it be encouraged? I can't tell you how disrespected and angry I felt when we were d-d-ditched for the third time at midnight. Kids in bed, I want to sleep... Jerk move.

We are taught to:

Love thy neighbor as thyself... 

If anything, this list, should have "debts owed to humanity" next to each offense. I don't know about you, but I actually hope my children read my facebook. I'm not perfect, but I can hope they see I care about who they grow up to be, I pray they love their neighbors and discourage their friends from behaving in a cruel manner. 

Here's a replacement list to think about.
1)Stopped a friend from dui- $100
2)Had the courage to say, "no"- $100
3)Undressed only for your spouse- $100
4)eh, go skinny dipping - $0
5)Obeyed the law like a nerd - $100
6)see above - $100
7)Helped a poor unsuspecting stranger clean egg off their house - $100
8)Drove like lives matter - $100
9)Visited a neighbor - $100
10)Sing your heart out - $100
11)Travel all you want - $100
12)Respect teachers that don't ever get paid enough to put up with your crap - $100
13)Heed counsel to clean up before it's too late - $100
14)see number 8 - $100
15)Return something lost or stolen - $100
16)Use firearms in the right time at the right place - $100
17)Helped clean up TP from a house - $100
18)See 5 - $100
19)See 12 - $100

20)Sure, meet a rock star - $0

Being mean isn't cool... riots are happening because of attitudes like this. Respect yourself, respect the law, and LOVE thy neighbor - no matter what they've done, how they look or what they believe.

POTTY TRAINING in 1-2-3...4-5

Potty training in two weeks (aka 3 days)

Follow these five key points and good luck! 

(reward YOURSELF at the end of the first three days so you don't kill anyone)

1: Go straight to underwear, be prepared for accidents, it is a fact of life. Pull-ups and the like are really designed to drag out potty training and cost you more money. They do not work.

2: Take to the potty every 30-60 minutes for 1-2 days and have child stay until something happens.

3: Reward system. This can be a sticker, getting a toy from a bag or a treat. We did toys for our first two children, but by the time #4 wanted to go potty, we had enough toys... so chocolate chips (semi-sweet, no dyes or junk like candybars... so if you pick something edible, make it small because you will be giving A LOT the first couple days.) Do NOT give the reward until after it happens, otherwise that is called a bribe and the child will expect it much too often without working for it.

4: Tough love. Many people stop potty training because you feel like making them sit on the potty when they don't want to is abuse or you find their stubborn attitude as a sign that they aren't ready. Well... it definitely isn't pleasant for either of you. There will come a point for most children were this scene will happen. They will be tired and impatient, they will tense up and not allow themselves to pee or poop. You, too, will be frustrated and might lose patience. Try to read, watch clips on a device or sing songs. Don't feel bad if there is 1-2 hours where it is a battle to get something to happen. LUCKILY, that one instance usually breaks a barrier and the child finally understands, "the quicker I go potty, the quicker I get OFF and get my reward!" Every time they get off the potty before "going," just sit them back on. Try to not be too rough, but look serious and repeat things like, "pee pee first," or "you need to go potty..."

5: When accidents happen... ROLE PLAY! Say "uh-oh!" have the child feel the wet underwear, try to get them to say "uh-oh" then go to the potty anyway, they usually can get a little more out. Do not punish or reprimand when they have an accident. Grown adults still have accidents when they are caught unprepared (or encounter bladder control issues) so give the little human a break. Don't make them think it is awesome, but treat the situation as "darn, let's avoid that next time," instead of the child as being "bad, gross or yucky." Practice by looking surprised and say "Oh! I need to go potty!" Then run to the potty and sit on it and say, "yay potty!" I know this sounds silly, but believe me, you will act like a weirdo doing what it takes to get this over with.

Have vinegar in a spray bottle and a bunch of washed towels to begin with no loads of laundry in line to be washed. This will make accidents easier for you mentally, absorb it up, spray with vinegar, absorb again - throw it all in the laundry.

The hardest part is over in 2-3 days maximum. As mentioned, the child will have learned by then to stay relaxed and just go. CHEER/give fives/clap/whatever every time! Just recently, I finished potty training #4 in my family, I also potty trained two children I babysat. If you dig your heels in and don't look back, your child will be fully potty trained in 2-3 weeks max. Won't that be GREAT!?

I personally have gone straight to underwear day AND night with all my children except #4. We are letting her have a diaper at night since she is not ready for a "big girl bed." That is just cruel to put her in a crib she can't get out of and expect her to hold it. I tried converting her crib and she freaked out, so not happening yet. :)

Ages my children were when we trained: 3.5, 20 months, 2.5 and 21 months. I do it when they show signs they are ready. Almost every child will 'strip' at some point, but if they strip right before or after they pee - that is a sign. If they beg to go on the toilet, that is a sign. If they grab their diaper every time they pee and/or poop, that is a sign. I personally love when they can speak the words, "pee pee," "poo poo," "potty," and "go." I also think it is great if they can pull down and put on their own pants and underwear. Prepare to help wipe #2 for 1-2 years if they potty train young. Feel free to comment or ask questions on anything I missed.

Momming it up - my parenting advice for newborns.

Yep. I already decided that momming is a verb. I mom it up all the time. Today I just wanted to write something for parents that only have one or two young babies.

Tips to help you care for your newborn.
1 Watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PgkZf6jVdVg&list=TLmmomz43XYfU
Seriously, it can change your life. If a baby is making the "ow" sound, swaddle, lay down, provide a sound machine and walk away. If a baby is crying for being super tired and you are rocking, changing positions, changing their diaper, singing and bouncing them - it isn't what they want. They will freak out more, confuse you more and you will feed them when they aren't hungry. So watch that video, listen to what they are telling you and don't give up if it didn't work the first time.

2 Gas relief. Just because you aren't hearing farts doesn't mean your baby isn't crying over gas pains. I had no idea that the need to burp and fart were causing my babies to not eat efficiently, causing them to spit up a lot more, preventing them from sleeping and causing them pain. There are a lot of gas relief options out there, my favorite is digestZen. It is amazing, you apply a tiny amount to their tummy and it works 100x better than anything I've tried before. I love it!

3 Breathe. You sing your favorite songs and accept whatever your baby does with a calm attitude. With our first baby crying, my husband and I would feel awful, "what do we do?!" We were so stressed and thought our baby would die if we couldn't calm him immediately. Now, when a baby cries, we hold them, speak softly and even in a low, sweet, yet mocking tone say, "oh no, the world is over!" Yes, babies will cry like the world is over. But it is not, we know that, so we need to help them feel that. When our sweet preemie came home from the NICU and she was still hooked up to a monitor showing her heartbeat, I could not believe what happened. I knew skin-to-skin was good for babies and it helped with bonding, but had no clue how powerfully healing it can be. Her heart rate was high, in the 190's for more than ten minutes... I thought the monitor was malfunctioning! Still, I was looking online what a normal pulse was for a baby her age and size and came across the suggestion of skin-to-skin to lower heart rate. I undressed her and put her against my chest. I think it took all of one or two minutes until she went down to the 160s and stayed there. I was amazed! I think ME being calm, helped her become calm. So calm parents have calmer babies! Try it.

4 Following that line of thinking, encourage daddy to have skin-to-skin time, yeah even if he has a hairy chest. This helps them bond with each other. It is weird to people that aren't parents yet, but shower with your baby. Who cares about their gender, just make sure another adult is home, the floor is grippy and you have a good hold on them. They love the water and they love being held - I think a warm shower being held by a parent is heaven on Earth for babies. Rarely will they not enjoy this. <3

5 If you are breastfeeding, PLEASE read my blog post about bottle-training.